The grandmother (my Mom) is probably the 2nd most tech-savy person in the chat. She has dug in on this on my sister’s side. It’s not a huge deal. I’ve accepted that I just need to wait till the defaults change. Any video I really care about I make her send straight to my wife.
Also, I did set my mom with an account on my immich server, but last time I had her phone iOS wasn’t playing nice with the automatic backup. I think maybe I’ll take another swing at this.