Now he knows her name, can easily find out where she lives, and spend the rest of his life showing up every time she says something about him.

🎶You’ve finally made a monkey out of meeeeeee!🎶

Powdered milk + regular milk + sweetened condensed milk

According to the google, non-venemous snakes are nope ropes. Venemous ones are danger noodles.

Dealing with a client at work who is going through this. Severely depressed, suicidal tendencies, will not exercise despite knowing it has helped him in the past. He knows what he needs to do, but we also know damn well that he’s going to go straight up to his room and play video games all day.

Motivating is extremely difficult when it comes to severe depression. You can’t just point out what they need to do. Doing so will likely just deepen their depression because they already know. Getting people to understand that not every brain works the same or responds to the same kind of reinforcements is incredibly frustrating.

Earth: Yo! Anyone DTF? Sends unsolicited dick pics

Universe: Ew… No… Blocked.

Fermi couldn’t have come close to guessing the real “Great Filter” had something to do with an app called Snapchat…

“Con” has brought us such deliciousness as “con queso” and “con carne.” It has my vote.

Gotta love fucking over the consumer twice! They’re gonna get, what, $5 out of a class action? $5 and a burned out cpu, yay!

Throw in some chocolate too! Junior Mint milk…

Fuschia on black is very hard to read for some people. Personally, even with my glasses on, the text fuzzes out. It’s very jarring

So I remember taking a flight 10 years ago and they gave us pretzel pieces from snyders. I thought, great, we don’t even get whole pretzels…

Next flight, they give us generic “trail mix” in clear bags. The kind the old folks down the street would give out at Halloween because it was “healthy.” but that contained approximately 2 pretzels the size of quarters, 3 peanuts, 3 generic m&ms, and 2 raisins…

It gave me the impression that airlines are like schools, where the flight staff are the ones bringing in the snacks because the airline is too cheap to supply them.

“You don’t buy the beer here. You rent it!”

I’m not sure I ever will be…

Make sure you watch the corrected DVD order because Fox thought more action would be better and put the 2nd episode first, the first episode 11th and totally fucked any hope for a second season…

Ah, so there it is! Red Bull, in fact, does give you wings!

And arrythmia…